Dating a sober person after he or she has come out of years of addiction is in itself an experience that will go down as one of the best feelings and experiences in life. Dating a sober human being is like a roller coaster ride whenever there seems to be a relapse of the addiction. In case you haven’t touched or done any kind of drugs or drinks in the past you will find it a bit tricky to handle a few situations arising because of the mood tantrums and the missing a sober person will show once you start dating. However as they say love is blind you need not fret much about the past habits or addictions of your partner. Rather focus on the future and live in the present. While dating a sober person you just need to be a bit sensitive and caring towards their needs for love and affection which they may require more than other individuals who have never been through a rough phase in life.
Go into the past life only to an extent your partner is comfortable
Talking about the past life to the now sober should be avoided. Unless and until he or she really wants you to hear out something regarding the past. Taking a sober person down the memory lane where he was an addict or a substance abuser is not the way a dating conversation should go. There is a risk of pushing back the sober human being into the things he or she has come out if you keep ranting about the past and making him or her feel guilty about the things or actions of the past. There are better things to discuss than the past.
Handle mood tantrums with love and care
A person who is sober will go through mood tantrums which are beyond control. While dating a sober person you need to accommodate the unreasonable mood tantrums that mat turn up any time and threaten your relationship. You need to be more understanding and empathetic. Generally the mood tantrum will take a few minutes to few days to end however at the end of the mood tantrum the person will also understand that the mood tantrum was uncalled for which gives you a sense of belonging to the relationship along with worth to your own personality.
Get your kick with the partner’s presence
In case you are the one who has become sober and are dating someone, get your share of kicking from the dating experience you are getting from your partner. Keep your options open to try something new and exciting with your dating partner. In case you are dating a sober person do not keep the relationship monotonous. Try and keep adding something new to your relationship. A new activity, a new place to visit over the weekend or even an unexplored place for camping will keep your relationship up and kicking.
Take some private time out for yourself
Being with a person who is sober can take a bit of toll on your personality. Have some private time for yourself outside the relationship. In case your dating partner does not like a particular activity that you love doing for example reading, take time out of the relationship and pursue your hobbies and passions. This will not only keep you charged up but will also unwind you of any relationship blues, stress or monotony that may creep in. Developing new interests in sync with your dating partner will be a big addition to the relationship.
Knowing the support network will work wonders
Your date will have a support network sometimes from the rehab. You are having your own support network. Keep that support network alive even if both of you are dating each other seriously and do not feel the need of anyone in life. This makes sure that you and your dating partner have someone to fall back upon in case emotional distress. Genuine advice and support for a sober person are very important which generally come from a support network he or she can created over the years. Get to know that support network and if possible become a part of it.
Asking for help at times will be a boost for the relationship
Asking help from a sober girlfriend or a boyfriend will help them to regain their lost confidence and open up the doors for them to seek help from you once they are in emotional distress. Asking for any kind of help even if we know the other person is not capable to help strengthens the bond between the two. Understanding and respect increase among couples who seek each other’s help frequently. However make sure that you are not creating a parasite that will look up to you for all their needs. Empowering your sober date is something you need to do so that a sense of worthiness is created.
A sober person will be a means of self development
A sober person is always discovering the new things he has been missing in himself, his date and the world around him or her. This is a process of a new personality development for the sober soul. Reach out and help the person to create a personality that allows him or her to see and feel the world in its true perspective. His past friends will try to get him back into the fold and people who know the sober person may try to pull him or her down. You as a dating partner need to be the shield around him or her to show the right path and the way ahead for the future along with you especially when you are planning on a long term relationship.
A sober person has a strong will power
A sober human being is a string willed human being and will surely be an asset to the relationship provided you are able to handle the unique demands of the relationship and carry it forward. A sober person will love you with his whole heart and will not be easily bogged down with the ups and downs of the relationship since he has seen plenty of it. It is you who is dating a sober person who needs to maintain his or her cool and take the relationship forward.